You May Be a Muslim If...

This is straight forward country thinking... Jeff Foxworthy on Muslims:   1. You grow poppeys and refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to liquor. You may be a Muslim 2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher and ammo, but you can't afford shoes. You may be a Muslim 3. You have more wives than teeth. You may be a Muslim 4. You wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider bacon and pork unclean. You may be a Muslim 5. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide. You may be a Muslim 6. You can't think of anyone you haven't declared Jihad against. You may be a Muslim 7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing. You may be a Muslim 8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs. You may be a Muslim 9. You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least four. You may be a Muslim 10. Your cousin is president of the United States . You may be a Muslim 11. You find this offensive or racist and won't forward it. You probably are a Muslim

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