Finally a well dressed Wal-Mart shopper. Just a housewife out shopping in Alaska. No permit required in Alaska for either open (must be 18) or concealed (must be 21) carry. --

=

A good one$$$$

> > The person who calculated this bit of information is now, and has been a professor at the University of West Virginia in Morgantown for the last
> > 40 some years.
> >
> > He says that:
> >
> > A clunker that travels 12,000 miles a year at 15 mpg uses 800 gallons of gas a year.
> >
> > A new vehicle that travels 12,000 miles a year at 25 mpg uses 480 gallons of gas a year.
> >
> > So, the average Cash for Clunkers transaction reduced gasoline consumption by 320 gallons per year.
> >
> > The government claims 700,000 clunkers have been replaced so that is 224 million gallons saved per year.
> >
> > That equates to a bit over 5 million barrels of oil.
> >
> > 5 million barrels is about 5 hours worth of US consumption.
> >
> > More importantly, 5 million barrels of oil at $70 per barrel costs about
> > $350 million dollars.
> >
> > So, the government paid $3 billion of our tax dollars to save
> > $350 million.
> >
> > They spent $8.57 for every $1.00 they saved.
> >
> > I'm pretty sure they will do a much better job with our healthcare though...NOT!!!!!!!

The Montana Department of Employment, Division of Labor Standards claimed a small rancher was not paying proper wages to his help and sent an agent out to investigate him.

AGENT: I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them.

RANCHER: Well, there's my hired hand that’s been with me for 3 years.

I pay him about $200 a week plus free room and board. Then there's the

mentally challenged guy. He works about 18 hours everyday and does about

90% of all the work around here. He makes about $10 per week, pays his

own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of bourbon every Saturday night

so he can cope with life. He also sleeps with my wife occasionally.

 

AGENT: That's the guy I want to talk to - the mentally challenged one.

RANCHER: That would be me.

 

Don Rickles, 84 yrs old, Speaks...

Hello, dummies! Oh my God, look at you. Anyone else hurt in the accident? Seriously, Senator Reid has a face of a Saint - A Saint Bernard. Now I know why they call you the arithmetic man. You add partisanship, subtract pleasure, divide attention, and multiply ignorance. Reid is so physically unimposing, he makes Pee Wee Herman look like Mr. T. And Reid's so dumb, he makes Speaker Pelosi look like an intellectual. Nevada is soooo screwed! If I were less polite, I'd say Reid makes Kevin Federline look successful. Speaking of the Speaker ... Nancy Pelosi, hubba, hubba! Hey baby, you must'v e been something before electricity. Seriously, the Speaker may look like an idiot and talks like an idiot but don't let that fool you. She really is an idiot.  Charlie Rangel ... still alive and still robbing the taxpayers blind. What does that make, six decades of theft? Rangel's the only man with a rent-controlled mansion. He's the guy who writes our tax laws but forgot to pay taxes on $75 grand in rental income! So why isn't he the Treasury Secretary? Rangel runs more scams than a Nigerian Banker. Barney Frank... he's a better actor than Fred Flintstone. Consider that he and Dodd caused the whole financial meltdown, and they're not only not serving time with Bubba and Rodney, they're still heading up the financial system! Let's all admit it ... Barney Frank slobbers more than a sheepdog on Novocain.. How did this guy g et elected? Oh, that's right ..... he's from Massachusetts . That's the state that elects Mr. Charisma, John Kerry -- man of the people! You know, if Senator Dodd were any more crooked, you could open wine bottles with him. Here's a news flash, Dodd: when your local newspaper calls you a "lying weasel," it may be time to retire. Dodd's involved in more shady deals than the Clintons . Even Rangel looks up to him! Press Secretary Robert Gibbs, I really respect you ... especially given your upbringing ~ All you've overcome. I heard your birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory. I don't know what makes you so dumb, but it really works for you. Personally, I don't think you're a fool, but what's my opinion compared to that of thousands of others? As for President Obama, what can I say? They say President Obama's arrogant and aloof, but I don't agree. Now it's true when you enter the room, you have to kiss his ring. I don't mind, but he has it in his back pocket. His mind is open to new ideas -- so open that ideas simply pass through it. Obama lies so much, I was actually surprised to find out his first name really was Barack. Just don't ask about his middle name! But Obama was able to set a record ..... he actually lied more in 60 days than Bill Clinton. FOR THOSE THAT VOTED FOR "HOPE AND CHANGE"..... BEND OVER AND PREPARE TO RECEIVE YOUR BOUNTY! President Obama just completed the UNHOLY and ANTI-AMERICAN TRIFECTA: 1st president in 110 years to miss the annual Army-Navy Football Game. 1st president to not attend any Christmas religious observance. 1st president to stay on vacation after a terrorist attack.   AND ALL IN THE SAME

TOP-10 'Only In America' Observations - by a Canadian:

1) Only in America, could a certain politician talk about the greed of the rich at a $35,000.00 a platecampaign fund-raising event.
2) Only in America, could people claim that the government still discriminates against black Americans when they have a black President, a black Attorney General, and an 18% black federal workforce, but a black population of only 12%. .
3) Only in America, could they have had the two people most responsible for the tax code, Timothy Geithner, the head of the Treasury Department, and Charles Rangel, who once ran the Ways and Means Committee, BOTH turn out to be tax cheats who are in favor of higher taxes.
4) Only in America, could they have terrorists kill people in the name of Allah and have the media primarily react by fretting that Muslims might be harmed by the backlash.
5) Only in America, could they make people who want to legally become American citizens wait for years in their home countries and pay tens of thousands of dollars for the privilege while they discuss letting people who sneak into the country illegally just 'magically' become American citizens.
6) Only in America, could the people who believe in balancing the budget and sticking by the country's Constitution be thought of as "extremists."
7) Only in America, could they need to present adriver's license to cash a check or buy alcohol, but not to vote.
8) Only in America, could they demand the government investigate whether oil companies are gouging the public because the price of gas went up, when the return on equity invested in a major U.S. oil company (Marathon Oil) is less than half of the return of a company making tennis shoes (Nike).
9) Only in America, could the government collect more tax dollars from the people than any nation in recorded history, still spend a Trillion dollars more than it has per year - for total spending of $7-Million PER MINUTE, and complain that it doesn't have nearly enough money.
10) Only in America, could the rich people - who pay 86% of all federal income taxes - be accused of not paying their "fair share" by people who don't pay any federal income taxes at all.

Fleming Bill Says NO to Power Grab on Spending “Only Congress should decide our debt ceiling. The president's blank check request needs a resounding NO from Congress.” Congress must not surrender its power over setting the debt ceiling. That’s why I introduced H.Res. 826, a resolution giving the House of Representatives an opportunity to reject President Obama’s attempt to control the debt ceiling. Washington has forgotten how to live within a budget. From bailouts and the failed stimulus bill, to the government takeover of health care, Americans are sick and tired of Washington's overzealous spending and its disregard of constitutional boundaries. We are in our fifth straight year of trillion dollar annual deficits, and the president believes that – despite the Constitution – the power of deciding how much more debt the government can accumulate belongs to him instead of Congress. The president is asking for a blank check, and he wants Congress to abdicate power to him so he can raise the debt ceiling as he pleases. H.Res. 826 affirms the value of our three-part government, and the checks and balances that keep the pendulum from sticking in the liberal position. Giving the president the ability to raise the debt ceiling– without congressional authority– would be giving him power far beyond anything the Constitution intended. H. Res. 826 must be passed to remind the president that Congress will not surrender its power. Together, we can continue to make sure our government remains as our forefathers intended. Sincerely, JOHN FLEMING, M.D. Member of Congress P.S. If you’d like more information, please take a minute to visit my website at www.fleming.house.gov or follow me on Facebook at www.facebook.com/repjohnfleming or on Twitter at www.twitter.com/repfleming

A Horse Tale........ Romney's horse So the Romneys are selfish for keeping a horse? And employing a groom with a family to support. And paying for feed that is sold by someone with a family to support and transported in trucks by someone with a family to support and manufactured in a factory by people with families to support from stuff that is grown by farmers with families to support. And having a barn built by construction workers with families to support with materials trucked by drivers with families to support from factories with workers with families to support. Sounds to me like that one horse has done more to put Americans to work than that horse's ass in the White House. AMEN!!!!!!!! "Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery..." -- Winston Churchill