Abbott & Costello

 

COSTELLO: I want to talk about the unemployment rate in America.

 

ABBOTT: Good Subject. Terrible Times. It's 9%.

 

COSTELLO: That many people are out of work?

 

ABBOTT: No, that's 16%.

 

COSTELLO: You just said 9%.

 

ABBOTT: 9% Unemployed.

 

COSTELLO: Right 9% out of work.

 

ABBOTT: No, that's 16%.

 

COSTELLO: Okay, so it's 16% unemployed.

 

ABBOTT: No, that's 9%.

 

COSTELLO: WAIT A MINUTE. Is it 9% or16%?

 

ABBOTT: 9% are unemployed. 16% are out of work.

 

COSTELLO: IF you are out of work you are unemployed.

 

ABBOTT: No, Obama said you can't count the "Out of Work" as the

unemployed. You have to look for work to be unemployed.

 

COSTELLO: BUT THEY ARE OUT OF WORK!!!

 

ABBOTT: No, you miss his point.

 

COSTELLO: What point?

 

ABBOTT: Someone who doesn't look for work can't be counted with those

who look for work. It wouldn't be fair.

 

COSTELLO: To whom?

 

ABBOTT: The unemployed.

 

COSTELLO: But they are ALL out of work.

 

ABBOTT: No, the unemployed are actively looking for work. Those who

are out of work gave up looking and if you give up, you are no

longer in the ranks of the unemployed.

 

COSTELLO: So if you're off the unemployment roles that would count

as less unemployment?

 

ABBOTT: Unemployment would go down. Absolutely!

 

COSTELLO: The unemployment just goes down because you don't look

for work?

 

ABBOTT: Absolutely it goes down. That's how Obama gets it to 9%.

Otherwise it would be 16%. He doesn't want you to read about 16%

unemployment.

 

COSTELLO: That would be tough on his reelection.

 

ABBOTT: Absolutely.

 

COSTELLO: Wait, I got a question for you. That means there are two

ways to bring down the unemployment number?

 

ABBOTT: Two ways is correct.

 

COSTELLO: Unemployment can go down if someone gets a job?

 

ABBOTT: Correct.

 

COSTELLO: And unemployment can also go down if you stop looking for

a job?

 

ABBOTT: Bingo.

 

COSTELLO: So there are two ways to bring unemployment down, and the

easier of the two is to have obama's supporters stop looking for work.

 

ABBOTT: Now you're thinking like the Obama Economy Czar.

 

COSTELLO: I don't even know what the hell I just said!

 

ABBOTT: Now you're thinking like Obama.