Today’s Stoic: Praying for Strength (and where to get it)

Why do we journal? Because we need to. Because it’s there for us in the moments we need it most. In the new documentary The Zen Diaries, viewers are given a glimpse into the journals of the comic Garry Shandling, a practicing Buddhist and deep thinker. There is a moment in the early eighties where Garry learns of the diagnosis his father had just gotten. On that day, he writes, “Dad has a malignant tumor. Weird. The fact of death is as common as a tree. I pray for my father’s health. I pray that he can have a few years that are fun and special to him. I pray for strength for my mother.” Now Shandling was a Buddhist, but this deeply personal entry has a number of Stoic themes and essential lessons as well (which should make us realize that wisdom is wisdom, wherever it comes from). First, the journaling itself is an important practice. He’s actively working through this difficult time by putting words on the page and talking to himself. Next, we have the Memento mori—Death is as common as a tree. It is a fact of life, one that we forget so we have to actively remind ourselves of it. Finally, Shandling prays but not in the way that a weaker person would. He is not asking to be magically relieved of his problems. Instead, he is praying for strength—for himself, for his family. He’s focusing on what he can do about this situation, rather than asking for something to be done for him. He’s also focusing on other people and what they need than on his own wants and desires. This must have been an extraordinarily difficult day for Shandling, one that tested him at the deepest level. Yet with the discipline he had practiced for so many years, he was able to rise to the occasion. And the truth is that we are all capable of that. But we have to put in the work—yesterday, today, tomorrow, so that we’re ready for that day when it comes for us