Saturday, March 2, 2013

The solicitor


> A farmer named Paddy had a car accident. He was hit by a truck owned by
the Eversweet Company.
> In court, the Eversweet Company's hot-shot solicitor was questioning
Paddy.
>
> 'Didn't you say to the police at the scene of the accident, 'I'm
fine?'asked the solicitor.
> Paddy responded: 'Well, I'll tell you what happened. I'd just loaded my
fav'rit cow, Bessie, into da... '
>
> 'I didn't ask for any details', the solicitor interrupted. 'Just answer
the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine!'?'
>
> Paddy said, 'Well, I'd just got Bessie into da trailer and I was drivin'
down da road.... '
>
> The solicitor interrupted again and said,'Your Honour, I am trying to
establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the
police on the scene that he was fine. Now several weeks after the accident,
he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please tell him to
simply answer the question. '
>
> By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Paddy's answer and said
to the solicitor: 'I'd like to hear what he has to say about his favourite
cow, Bessie'.
> Paddy thanked the Judge and proceeded.'Well as I was saying, I had just
loaded Bessie, my fav'rit cow, into de trailer and was drivin' her down de
road when this huge Eversweet truck and trailer came tundering tru a stop
sign and hit me trailer right in da side. I was trown into one ditch and
Bessie was trown into da udder. By Jaysus I was hurt, very bad like, and
didn't want to move. However, I could hear old Bessie moanin' and groanin'.
I knew she was in terrible pain just by her groans.
>
> Shortly after da accident, a policeman on a motorbike turned up. He could
hear Bessie moanin' and groanin' too, so he went over to her. After he
looked at her, and saw her condition, he took out his gun and shot her
between the eyes.
>
> Den da policeman came across de road, gun still in hand, looked at me, and
said, 'How are you feelin'?'
>
> 'Now wot da fock would you say?'
>
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